My soul hurts. Apart from that I'm fine thank you for asking.

my size, my size! yo i'm talking to you!

 

 

 

Went to Telford with Bambi shopping. I had a good laugh and great time although was abit flustered and hormonal - left a bag in the coffee shop!. Bambi did really well - there were loadsa people bumping into us and not caring plus the coffee shop was packed and the staff didn't have the best customer service but she seemed more chilled than me :)

As soon as me and J left Bambi he practically turned!
J: You were suppose to spend the whole day with me today...thats what you promised but you went to Telford  - shopping with Bambi!

Me: Well I'm v hormonal..I thought it was for the best not to see you as much.

J: You are selfish then

Me: ... -.-

Me: I thought Bambi needed me more.

J: You saw her last night!

Me: Wasn't long enough!
-walks separately down the road both sulking-
J: You're not even going to say sorry then!
Me: I don't know what to say sorry for!
...
Me: So where are we going if we're not going to yours

J: I don't know you can go home if you want

Me: Okay...You don't want to see me then

J: It's not that I don't want to...I'm just mad at you.

Me: -rolls eyes- I'm sorry!

J: You aren't though!

Me: I am!

...

J: I'm sorry for calling you selfish.

Father being annoying again. Yea I really hate him. I don't think I've ever hated anyone more than him.

-

Ahh I see..

Him: I called you before
Me: Yea I'm sorry
Him: whats wrong?
Me: nothing
Him: I'm sorry I fell asleep
Me: It's ok
Him: Well it's what we agreed...I said I wanted to see you..but you said no...its's what we agreed.
-silence-
Me: Yea
Him: Well I can't be on for long..I have to get back..I didn't think you'd pick up, thought you'd be asleep.
-silence-
Me: ok -slight sigh-
Him: Anything you wanna say? Anything on ur mind?
Me: No...nothing -.-
Him: Okay. bye
Me: Bye.

Talk to girlfriend for abit as I did fall asleep and missed seeing her?
No..no..got to get back and talk to online people and RS again.
Right.

Maybe i'm over sensitive and hormonal.

Hit the "pause" button

Had stupid meeting yesterday. Hated it- like expected. Was crap- like expected.
Have to now persevere to be focused-on-the-ball-ice-queen.

Father spoke to me in the car yesterday about me and J was the most embarassing thing ever
him: it will break your mothers heart if you end up in a mess with him
me: we're not doing anything
him: don't insult my intelligence
him: better get you on the pill
me: we're not
him: well whats wrong with you both? must be something wrong somewhere? Is he gay?
-.-

First day back after meeting (Today) was okay have a headache though. On period so very emotional at the moment. I remember nearly crying at something today although I can't remember what. I'm sure it was nothing.

Was Arthurs funeral today. Kelly went and I saw her with her hair down. She looked nicer.
Food at work sucked today and the filling is building up -.-
Alfie is being not strange...but different to me...I sense it...and it's not different in a good way.
But whatever.

Texted bambi at work...got worried because got no reply but called her just and she seems ok :) (although my phone cut out because I ran out of credit) She is so good when I'm feeling low. thank goodness i have her.

Also rang J before work. Fat lot of use he is. He can ring me from now on. Anyway with me concentrating on work I won't be able to see him much in the coming weeks. When I broke this to him he seemed un-phased. I thought he'd whine until kingdom come like he normally does. Infact today he said that I should see Bambi before him! I agreed of course. Strange...But again...whatevers.

My father just told me that a 34 y.o man got raided where my 1/2 brother lives and they found what seems to be a make shift bomb. I really hope it's not my half brother. I can't see why he would make a bomb maybe someone put it there. I don't see him very often but each time I do he's nice. Abit odd, dopey and a dreamer like me. But harmless of course! My father said when he was my age he dated the prettiest girl in the school...He went away for something for a couple of weeks and when he came back she was with his bestfriend! My father said after that he wasn't right and dabbled in drugs and such, never worked either.

I don't think he has anyone.
His mum is all loved up and is in London.
My father just called his house phone. Noone's picking up. It's not looking good.

get in my bed!

;;- oi oi fitshittt digits digits innit innit wit wooooo lemme get some abit of alriiiight any day any way babes' so fine your a ten aye papi chulo. Baby, jevoudrais juste te faire l'amour jusqu'au bout La vie estbien trop courte: tu devrais en profiter Je n'ai pastoute la nuit, alors viens m'embrasser mmm tatts me gustan los hombres delgados offttt why u gotta have such sexy swag fo?

-.-

work now :/
then seeing bambi :D
hope it goes okay...I want them to keep me on!

XX

I am runnin' this you are just a dog walker!

I went to town with Bambi yesterday was fun and also good to get out and around again. She calms me down. I bought two sets of rings they're quite cute :) and a high wasted denim skirt from H&M...that I tried on later and was too small so might take it back. man my hips are sooo big. I know it's not a bad thing and it's womanly though. Bought a purse too from Accessorize (that when I showed J he said his nan would buy - As you can imagine not flattered by that statement).

After town I got dropped off my bambi's mum by Js, where we then went to his nans for her birthday. Was nice to meet all the family, they seem chill n welcoming. I'm abit socially awkward though.

Then J and I went to go see pirates of the carribean 4 3D...was really good. Predictable though. I thought the mermaid Syrena - asrtid berges-frisbey had a strange face but beautiful non the less! she has the same skin tone, eyes and hair and my BFF. I googled her just and also found out when she auditioned for the part she also had to do part of it topless!! (as disney wouldn't cast anyone for the part with fake breasts) .